Missing Husband Report

A lady went to the police station to file a report for her missing Husband:

Lady: I lost my Husband
Inspector: What is his height
Lady: I never noticed
Inspector: Slim or healthy
Lady: Not slim can be healthy
Inspector: Colour of eyes
Lady: Never noticed
Inspector: Colour of hair
Lady: Changes according to season
Inspector: What was he wearing
Lady: Suit/casuals I don’t remember exactly
Inspector: Was somebody with him………????
Lady: Yes my Labrador dog, Calvin, tied with a golden chain, height 30 inches, healthy, blue eyes, blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken, he never barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls, he likes non veg food, we eat together, we jog together….

And the lady started crying…..

Inspector: Let’s search for the dog first……..!!!!

Ah Beng Make Perfect Sentence With Numbers

Ah Beng was asked to make a sentence using 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did itagain from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with…..
1 day I go 2 climb a 3 outside a house to peep. But the couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rushed out and wanted to 5 with me. I ran until I fell 6 and threw up. So I go into 7-eleven and grabbed some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab at him. 10 God he run away.

10 I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7-eleven. Next day I called my boss and told him I was 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also asked me to go climb a 3 and jump down. I don’t understand. I am so nice 2 him but I don’t know what he 1.

Ah Beng and Ah Lian before marry

See how Ah Lian turn down unwanted Ah Beng before they get married. Very funny conversation.

Ah Beng : Can I buy you a drink?
Ah Lian : Actually I’d rather have the money..

Ah Beng : Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
Ah Lian : Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice

Ah Beng : Will you go out with me this Saturday?
Ah Lian : Sorry. I’m having a headache this weekend.

Ah Beng : Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out.
Ah Lian : Okay, get out.

Ah Beng : I think I could make you very happy.
Ah Lian : Why? Are you leaving?

Ah Beng : What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
Ah Lian : Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

Ah Beng : Can I have your name?
Ah Lian : Why? Don’t you already have one?

Ah Beng : Where have you been all my life?
Ah Lian : Hiding from you.

Ah Beng : Haven’t I seen you some place before?
Ah Lian : Yes. That’s why I don’t go there anymore.

Ah Beng : Is this seat empty?
Ah Lian : Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Ah Beng : If I could see you naked, I’d die happy.
Ah Lian : If I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing.

2nd Point Of View ( CAN I GET A1 BY WRITTING THIS ESSAY ??? )

                                   Hantu Essay

The following are the Hantu  Essay content, pls enjoy......

            Pada malam itu, ibu bapa saya tiada di rumah. Saya tinggal di rumah seorang diri. Saya berasa sangat takut.

           Tiba-tiba, saya mendangar suara orang menetok pintu. Saya sangat takut. Saya pun membuka pintu.Tiba-tiba saya terlihat seekor hantu. Hantu itu memandang saya. Saya sangat takut, lalu menutup pintu..

         Selepas itu pintu saya diketuk lagi. Saya lagi takut. Saya pergi buka pintu. Hantu tadi masih ada disitu. Hantu itu memandang saya. Saya sangat takut, lalu menutup pintu.

        Selepas itu pintu saya diketuk lagi. Saya sangat takut, lalu saya pergi buka pintu. Hantu itu sangat takut. Saya pun menutup pintu kerana saya sangat takut.

       Selepas itu, ibu dan bapa saya balik. Hantu itu sudah tiada. Saya sangat gembira. Ibu saya memeluk saya. Dia sangat gembira. HANTU ITU GEMBIRA JUGAKAH?

SPM !!!

SPM COMING !!!! Might not be updating my blog 4 few weeks.

你是我的眼

如果我能看得见
就能轻易分辨白天黑夜
就能准确的在人群中牵住你的手

如果我能看得见
就能驾车带你到处遨游
就能惊喜的从背后给你一个拥抱

如果我能看得见
生命也许完全不同
可能我想要的我喜欢的我爱的

都不一样
眼前的黑不是黑
你说的白是什么白

人们说的天空蓝
是我记忆中那团白云背后的蓝天
我望向你的脸

却只能看见一片虚无
是不是上帝在我眼前遮了帘
忘了掀开

你是我的眼
带我领略四季的变换
你是我的眼

带我穿越拥挤的人潮
你是我的眼
带我阅读浩瀚的书海

因为你是我的眼
让我看见这世界就在我眼前
就在我眼前

就在我眼前

Finally I M Back

Yeah.............. finally  bek from UM 'Hotel'................ quite a long time din update my blog cos i had a dengue n had 2 stay at the 'hotel' 4 almost a week!!!!! Its is damn freaking bored at thr........ eat......slp.......eat slp........haiz......... i oso tek tis advantage 2 thank my friends tat visit me at tat freaking 'hotel'....... tis r the schedule tat i m at the 'hotel'

12 Oct 09

Wake up at bout 8 am then went 2 UM see doctor..... wait thr 4 bout 2 - 3 hours n i m bout getting fed up bout the hospital system...... its is damn freaking 'FAST' !!!!!!! Then wait until 2 or 3 pm n the doctor said tat my palete is veli low n  i had dengue n i hav 2 stay up at the 'hotel' until recoverd...... DAMN IT!!!! It would b veli boring..........

13 Oct 019

Hmm. suddenly got nose bleeding n the bleeding cant STOP!!!! Damn it!!!! 1st time being like tis.......... at bout 8 or 9am A professor bring 1 group of trainee doc n examine me...... all those dac asking the same freaking question until i no nid hear oso noe wat they wanna say...... these are the ques tat thay az

Ques 1

Whr do you lived?

Ques 2

Whr u study?

Ques 3

Does they any dengue cases near yr housing area?

Ques 4

Does any1 in yr hse got dengue?

Ques 5

Does u fell nausea, vomitting, n others stuff (lazy 2 list out) ?

Ques 6

Can I called u THAM?

Ques 7

Do u tek Paracetomol at home?

Ques 8

Dia u go jungle trackking?

14 Oct 09

Being disturbed by the nurse 4 taking the blood pressure........ haiz.......... 6 am in the morning, all ppl slping then cum kacau.......then hav a veli boring day thr, then at bout 8 am, doc cum tek my blood 4 blood test........

15 Oct 09

Ntg special........ pity my mom tat hav 2 run 2 n flow  bcos hav 2 tek k of me.......at bout 6 smtg or 7 pm, a group of friends cum visit me (thx 4 those hu coming visit me), i get shocked tat so many ppl noe tat i got dengue......we had a talked n laugh (pity candy n yap) cos 2 of them were cursed by us....... lol.......then Michael fetch them bek at bout 8pm......

16 Oct 09

Doc said i hav 2 be examined 4 a day so hav 2 stay until 2moro oni can discharge from the 'hotel'

17 Oct 09

Damn freaking happy cos can go bek home but i hav 2 wait 4 E&T doc cum 2 tek of my nose pad oni i can go home.......freaking bored while waiting him cos he had a operation 2 do...... i waited from morning until nite..... at bout 6 smtg then he cum n tek out the pad....... yeah...... finally i can go bek home but i hav 2 wait 4 bout an hour 2 discharge from the ward........ at bout 8pm......i finally went bek home......HOME SWEET HOME.......

TATS ALL 4 TIS POST

Malaysia "Boleh"

天天说Boleh
>
>
> 工作说Letih
>
> 辛勤工作给国税
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> 没挂国旗就是罪
>
>
>
> 强盗小偷一大堆
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> 警察政府都在睡
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> X里挑拨话题就OK
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> 明志raprap要定罪
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>
>
> 天天嘴里说要fair
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> 固打特权别想废
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> 政府部门是最yeah
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> 平时投诉没人care
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> 到了大选路repair
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>
>
> 部长简直是superman
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> 百万工程会漏水
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> 喜喜哈哈说OK
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> 黑锅出来大家推
>
>
>
> 国产车不见的很hightech
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> 价钱给你供到很upset
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> 华小要建华社得捐钱
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> 国小要钱政府乐的给
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>
>
> 法律世界最dramatics
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> 杀人放火没有罪
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> 狱里大哥问我什么罪
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> 我说没带IC坐半年
>
>
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> 政府医院最危险
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> 医生护士一大堆
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> 靠的住的没一些
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> 进了能出来得celebrate
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>
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> 议员家庭最富贵
>
> 家园建的象palace
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> 甘邦组屋居民最可悲
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> 天天都得担心要睡街
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>
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> 大道公司是吸血鬼
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> 几公里路程都要给
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> smart tunnel好神奇
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> 又能通车又通水
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> 大雨KL还是得照淹
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>
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> 吧士司机最敬业
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> 接了传票照样on the way
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> 还要吸毒来够high
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> 出了车祸森林hide
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>
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> 议院就像幼稚园
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> 议员出嘴就成脏
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> 国家大事没论成
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> 笑话到是一大堆
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>
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> 常常无语问苍天
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> 这个国家为何那么sad
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> 上天也无言以对
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> 怪只怪我的皮肤不够黑
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>
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> 写到这里已要睡
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> 现实社会太惨悲
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> 唯有梦里寻乐园